The Ballad of Chad 

by Charles Jones

Listen my children to you old granddad

And I’ll tell you a story that’s really sad

Back in the year two thousand and zero

When the whole nation looked for a hero

We go Chad.

After a long, bitter, hard fought campaign

Between a liar and a man with no brain

Only one State remained so divided

The winner might have to be decided

By Chad.

The voters had spoken in Florida

They’d said, well, ah.., you know,..duh.

We can’t decide with any precision,

So let someone else make the decision.

How about Chad?

Holena Ballot felt somebody blew it

When she was poked everyone knew it.

She wasn’t dimpled, she never dangled,

And nothing was loose with nothing mangled.

Not like that Chad!

So the recount got started and some more

Votes were added to for the side of Al Gore.

The Bush backers said, “That just isn’t fair.

You’ve altered the rules so don’t even dare

Count that Chad”.

So the case was sent to the Supreme Court.

The judges said, “Stop! You’ll have to abort.

We can’t say for certain which dents are votes.

There are no guidelines and there are no notes

About that Chad.

Well, now you know children how five to four

George Bush was elected and not ole Al Gore.

How each Supreme Justice in a black robe

Repaid his Party for the favors he owed.

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